My Simulated Professional Self
From Simulation and Simulacra, have I become a simulated professional? Simulated in the sense that there is no ‘real’ definition of this product. I cyborg, the mix of human/machine, addicted to technology, addicted to the idea of power through knowledge. Why am I a simulation, a ghost a phantasm, a Wii virtual me? Who has the control, directing me to where I should go, feel, think? The power is not itself but an illusion of power, but even this illusion is an illusion for there can be no illusion as we have abstracted our-self away from any notion of the’real’. How did a job come about with the title of “Data Miner”? Is this not an abstraction, simulation of a miner, the metaphor based upon some historical connection a rose tinted past? My title “E-Learning Consultant”, is this not buried within a simulation of learning, a simulation, an alluded connection with an old idea of learning, an abstraction connection to some ethereal binary, multimode, phase sifted, routed, firewalled, anti virus, processed, random access memory?
The control of this actual virtual Wiime of a professional lies within a simulated idea of power, there is no power, just a ever changing notion of historicised, fantasised power. The students now have the power, the teachers have lost the power, the power is in the hands of the consumer, plug into the power, my machine (I Cyborg) has lost power. Yet we fear this power, but there is none. This fantasy controls my definition of my simulated me, I am a character in the Disney Land of learning, failure waits the dismal car-park outside the boundary of pleasure. I have caught myself self in the inter net network of belief, yet I desire to be there, I desire the non-illusion, I see it for itself, myself self, and feel the pull of the windows, making my macro self soft in the head.
I am a happy simulated self, what is the real? I have abstracted myself self away from this real, it is a non illusion, illusion, write only memory of a distant re-written history.
Yet I fantasise that this happiness is a fantasy of illusion-non-illusion, but this makes my happy. My happiness is a simulation, abstraction, it reflects back to itself to myself self.
Will there be a day of re-booting?